New post... can you believe it?

So a little update on my life... I am living in Mississippi, as most of you know. I like it here for the most part but I am having trouble getting into the swing of things!!
Never in my life have I searched for a job. I have always just known someone that hooks me up, or my fabulous personality and my big boobs seal the deal with high paying jobs with good hours. There is not a market here for the makeup thing, well not to my standard I guess. I have sent my resume (medical, adminitrative and makeup artist) everywhere!! It kinda hurts my pride that I haven't got a bite!
I really regret not finishing college. I was so on the ball in high school, earning college credits and getting good grades.. Speaking of being on the ball in HS, what the crap happened to me? I was so good with grades, with working out and dieting. I had the best self control ever!! I had no problem making friends or going out! I dont know if I am getting old or because I am growing up my personality has changed for the worst!! When I think about myself 6-7 years ago, and think about myself now.. I am totally different!
I am ok with being different. I like myself now. I may not be as funny or as out going. But I am still a good person.
So to end this post... do I strive to be the old Mackenzie or just keep growing in the direction I am going?